


Wishlist

by t00rusimp



Category: Haikyuu!!, ハイパープロジェクション演劇「ハイキュー!!」| Hyper Projection Play "Haikyuu!!" RPF
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Drama, Drug Use, F/M, Hospitals, Mentions of Cancer, Needles, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:28:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28830420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/t00rusimp/pseuds/t00rusimp
Summary: In which [Y/n] [L/n] and Suna Rintarō make a deal to help each other. But was it really a good idea from [Y/n] to leave out the fact that she was dying ?Suna Rintarō x reader ( Angst )
Relationships: Suna Rintarou & Reader, Suna Rintarou/Reader
Kudos: 13





	1. Prologue

"We're only going to take some blood from you sweetie, to test if we forgot any bad cells. The result will be here any minute." The older nurse sat next to the little girl and explained what was going to happen, they always did. 

Yes they left out a few facts here and there, but does a ten year old girl really know what adenocarcinoma, squamous cell carcinoma are ? 

It was already hard enough to tell her that she has cancer. [Y/n] thought that she maybe ate a crab in her sleep, but quickly learned that it wasn't. 

Pain. That's what she felt in her lungs. While she was breathing, eating, sleeping and walking. And she was tired, so so tired. 

Mostly after the doctors gave this liquid medicine into her arm. They called it Chemo and it's was apparently helping her. 

But [Y/n] didn't like this medicine. It made her throw up, lose her hair, tired and weak. Ever since she moved into this new big white house, [Y/n] wasn't allowed to go to school. She wasn't allowed to see her friends.

But the nurses and doctors always visited her and tried to make her laugh. They even gifted her a little stuffed animal when she was first diagnosed with cancer. It was a little teddybear that was wearing a dinosaur costume. [Y/n] loved the bear and always had him with her. To every test, scan or anywhere else. 

Sometimes [Y/n] liked hanging out with the nurses, they played hide and seek with her or watched movies when her father was at work. 

Yes [Y/n]'s father, Hiroshi [L/n]. He didn't take the information well, when he found out that his nine year old daughter has cancer. It was the same cancer which killed his wife, only two years after [Y/n] was born. 

He tried to stay strong for her, to always smile and laugh, but [Y/n] heard him crying in the bathroom when he thought that she was asleep. 

She wanted to help him, go to him into the bathroom and hug him, but she knew that as soon as he saw that she was awake he would wipe the tears away and pretend that nothing was going on.

Today was a good day. At least that's what [Y/n]'s favorite nurse, Emica Sakusa, told her. Her father and a few doctors came inside her room this morning and told her that the crabs inside her body were gone. 

"No more Chemo, injections or blood taking." That's what nurse Sakusa told her and [Y/n] smiled for the first time in a long time. 

"Okay and what are we going to do afterwards ?" [Y/n] looked at her father who sat in one the chairs next to the cupboard, where the injections were inside. 

"How about we go home and order food from your favorite restaurant ?" [Y/n]'s eyes immediately widen. Don't get her wrong, but the hospital food wasn't exactly a gourmet restaurant. 

Before the girl could answer a doctor came inside the room. Ms Sakusa stood up and ripped the papers out of his hands. She read through them and a smile lit up in her face. 

[Y/n]'s father stood up and looked at her with hope in his eyes. The women nodded and turned to the little girl. [Y/n] didn't know what was going on, but immediately wanted to know why everyone was smiling. 

"[Y/n], it's gone. Your cancer, it's gone." 

— 5 years later 

"[Y/n] [L/n] ?" A nurse came out of one of the ambulance rooms. The girl looked up and saw that it was Ms Sakusa who had the same smile as usual. 

"Ms Sakusa" The girl stood up from her seat and went to hug the women, who immediately hugged back. "Come inside sweetheart." 

[Y/n] smiled at her and entered the room. It was the same room she sat inside five years ago. She remembered all of it, where the injections are, the disinfection sprays, the bandages, just everything. 

But she wasn't the ten year old girl she was five years ago. [Y/n] was now 15 years old, she grew up. Her hair grew back, hair pain went away and most importantly she finally understood what was really going on five years ago. 

What hasn't changed yet was the fact that she still had the little teddybear. Yeah it might look a bit older now, but he still made her feel like home. 

"Come on sit down, how's school going ?" "It's good. I'm scared for the new school though. I wonder how it's going to be like in Inarizaki, since it's starting in a month." Ms Sakusa laughed at the girl. 

"It's going to be as good as now okay ? Believe in yourself." [Y/n] rolled her eyes with a smile. Ms Sakusa was still her favorite nurse, yes she wasn't in hospital as often as before, but she was always there when [Y/n] had a checkup. 

"Okay now i'm gonna listen to your lungs and heart with the Stethoscope. Okay ?" [Y/n] nodded, these checkups always went the same way. First they listen to her lungs and heart, then the blood test, then the scans and then waiting for the result till it came out negative and she was free to go. 

But this time [Y/n] wasn't here for a checkup. Her father had called the hospital, because [Y/n] started coughing a bit more. The girl found it a stupid reason to freak out, but she let her father do his thing. He almost lost her five years ago, she understands his protectiveness. 

"Okay [Y/n] where does it hurt ?" [Y/n] pointed at her left lung, right under her third rib. Ms Sakusa looked at her in worry but tried to not show it. "Okay there's nothing to worry about. We are just going to do some tests and then we will see what going on." 

[Y/n] nodded and let the women do her work. They talked about everything. [Y/n] complained about how her dad won't let her do any sport at school and Ms Sakusa talked about how she was a bit worried for her son, since he is becoming a germaphobe. She wasn't exactly against it, but was scared that people might bully him for it. 

Hours later, Ms Sakusa had the test results in her hands. She was sitting right next to [Y/n] holding her hand. "We are going to open it together okay. It isn't going to be anything bad." 

[Y/n] nodded, not really knowing what to do. Yes at first she found it stupid to go to the hospital because of coughing, but as soon as she began to feel pain in her left lung, she also got worried. 

She just needed this Negative. A negative test, that there weren't any cancer cells inside her body. She needed it written down somewhere or someone who tells her. 

Ms Sakusa opened the file and read through it. [Y/n] didn't really understand what stood there, but there was something that caught her eye. In every checkup there was not one positive in the file, but today, there stood a few positives next to medical words. 

Ms Sakusa's smile faded as soon as she read this one sentence. "Patient tested Positive." [Y/n] looked at the women in hope but it was gone when she saw her tears falling. 

"I am so sorry [Y/n]." 

— Time skip 

4 weeks later and [Y/n] was sitting in the same room again, with her little teddybear in her arms. This time it wasn't for a checkup. No. It was two days after her first chemo treatment. [Y/n]'s father sat next to her and held her hand, while they were waiting for the doctors. 

Both of them were waiting for the results of the chemo, if it has made the cancer smaller or if anything else happened. Maybe it has spread out or it got smaller ? 

[Y/n] was tired. She hasn't slept anything these past days. Not only because school is starting in a few days, but also because she has spent the whole night researching what would happen. 

And Google told her that she was going to die in 2 days because of the liquid inside her body. Well maybe it wasn't exactly the best idea to search it up. 

Suddenly the door opened and a few doctors and Ms Sakusa went inside the room. The women smiled at the girl in comfort and hugged her. 

"Ms [L/n] we- We sadly don't have such good news today." One of the doctors looked at her and her father, trying not to freak them out. "Excuse me what do you mean by that what is-" 

"Dad calm down." The girl took her fathers hand and pushed him back onto the medical bed she was sitting in. "Mr [L/n], if you don't want your daughter to know we can talk outside and-" 

"No i want to know what is going on." Everyone could hear the worry in her voice. Desperate for answers the girl looked at the nurse who sat next to her. Ms Sakusa had tears in her eyes and [Y/n] knew that it was really bad now. 

The doctor nodded and sat in front of [Y/n]. He tried to comfort her with a smile, but even he broke down a bit. He knew the girl since she was nine years old years old and now telling her this was the worst thing he has ever done. 

"[Y/n] i am so sorry to tell you this but, the cancer it's- It's not the stage we assumed it to be in. The tests have shown us that this is a stage 4 cancer. It is different from the one you had five years ago. It is spreading faster and is more aggressive forwards your body. In this stadium the chemo won't do a lot and today's result have proven it. I'm so sorry but there isn't much we can do for you. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, this is my first book on ao3, so please tell me if i'm doing something wrong. I'm sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes. Other then that, I hope that you liked the chapter.


	2. one.

7 - 8 months. That's how much time the doctors gave her. Till she was going to. [Y/n] couldn't even bare to say it out loud. 

She had half a year left, not more. Why ? Why was this happening to her, why her, why now ? [Y/n] is only fifteen years old, she isn't going to be able to finish high school, not even her first year. 

Why couldn't this happen when she was 95 years old, when she has done everything life had to offer for her ? Why only at 15 ?

[Y/n] was laying in her bed, looking at the ceiling, thoughts running through her head. Why was this happening to her ? She couldn't find a reason for this, neither could anyone else. 

The doctors have sent her home after they have told her the news, they wanted her to calm down and come back next weekend, where they would do even more tests. 

But why ? There wasn't anything to test anymore. She was slowly dying, just like her mother and no one could help her. 

Her mother. Would she see her when she was dead. Would the woman even recognize her ? Is there a place she was going to be or is she going to stay on earth as a ghost and watch over her father.

Yes [Y/n]'s father. He wasn't home at the moment. As soon as they were home, he told [Y/n] he would take a walk. It has been four hours. [Y/n] could understand him, his daughter is dying. No parent should witness this. 

He has already lost his wife and now losing his daughter as well, it hit him like a truck. "Stupid genes." [Y/n] turned around in her bed and looked at the picture on her nightstand. 

It was a picture of her as a baby in her moms arms. The woman looked so happy and so did [Y/n]'s father who had that spark in his eyes. [Y/n] has never seen that spark. 

"I have that from you, it's that same stupid thing that killed you and now it's killing me." [Y/n]'s voice became more furious, as she thought more about everything. 

The girl grabbed the picture and threw it against the floor, glass now laying everywhere. [Y/n]'s tears streamed down her face as she saw the mess she just made. 

"These are your stupid genes ! I don't want to die, mom please don't let me die. Don't let this thing kill me." [Y/n] didn't know who exactly she was talking to. Maybe her mom was still watching over her and trying to comfort her ?

"Ah shit-" [Y/n] stood up and tried to pick up the broken glass, but cut her finger. She looked at the blood, maybe the tests were just wrong ? Could her body fight the disease ? 

It has done it five years ago and her body won, so why would it lose now ? But the doctors already said that it was a more aggressive stage of cancer. When she was younger she had a Stage 2 cancer, this is a stage 4. 

"It's killing me from the inside." [Y/n] mumbled to herself. It was a bit amusing to her, some people die because of a natural death or a car accident, but no [Y/n] had a thing that's eating her body from the inside, that's what is going to kill her. 

"7 or 8 months and then i'll be laying in a coffin. Do you think it smells bad in there." [Y/n] looked at the little Teddybear next to her pillow. It fell a bit to the side as she "talked" to him. 

"Same." [Y/n] laughed to herself, was she really talking to a stuffed animal right now ? Maybe she should call her friend, no he was probably playing a video game right now and she didn't want to bother him. 

"7 months, let's see what day it is." [Y/n] stood up, got her computer and laid down on her bed again. She took the stuffed animal and sat it down next to her head. 

"No that's a bad date. Dying on a Friday who wants that. Maybe we can ask the cancer to kill me on a Saturday, it's just like 1 more day maybe it has a bit mercy ?" [Y/n] looked at the stuffed animal, yes maybe that cancer has already affected her brain. 

"No they said it only spread into the right lung, i'm not going crazy." [Y/n] thought about it, how was it even able to spread in four weeks. 

"I should stop thinking about this, let's just watch an anime." [Y/n] took the stuffed animal and went downstairs to get some snacks. When she opened the fridge she saw that her dad has bought her favorite bubble tea and her favorite ramen. 

Her dad always knew what the girl needed in some situations. Well he originally bought this for a after Chemo tests treatment, but now it was a different occasion. 

[Y/n] opened the refrigerator and saw that there was still her favorite ice cream. "They'll just have to get a bigger coffin." She shrugged it off, took the ice cream and went to her room. 

She laid down on her bed again and looked at the anime's she could watch. "Yuri on ice, Banana fish, Given, Attack on Titan or Free. Which one should we watch ?" [Y/n] looked at the anime's trying to chose between one of them. 

The girl's eyes wandered through her room, looking at all the anime posters, mangas and plants, till she saw a green book laying on her desk. This book didn't lay there before, maybe her father put it there. 

[Y/n] stood up and went to take a better look at the book. It was decorated with crabs, dinosaurs and old hospital stickers, the ones the doctors used to see who's blood tests it is.

And suddenly [Y/n] remembered the book. It was her old "Diary" from the time she was living in the hospital. Yes [Y/n] was a little girl but she always wrote down her thoughts or drew something. 

[Y/n] smiled a bit and sat down on her bed again, with the book in her lap. Her computer gave her a bit of light, which made her able to read everything. 

On the first page were lots of little drawings of what looked like doctors. The further she went the more paragraphs stood there, yes it was a pretty bad writing, but [Y/n] was still able to read everything. 

[Y/n] read through the book, tears slowly streaming down her eyes. Her ten year old self wrote about pain, not being able to breath, her fear of needles, her coughing up blood and being to weak to even walk. 

No ten year old should be going through this, at this age she should be enjoying life and meet new friends at school.

Suddenly she came to a page where a lot of stuff stood. [Y/n] was confused as to what happened on this day so she began to read all of it. 

"The crabs are gone. Well that's what Ms Sakusa said. When I get out of this house i want to learn how to skateboard, a doctor said that it's cool and dad said that we should visit the ocean as well. When i'm 15 i also want to go and visit Kenma, Kuroo, Akaashi, Bokuto and maybe Karasuno and Seijoh. But it's a six hour and 32 minute drive ( i did my research ) and dad doesn't want that, i also want to-" 

[Y/n] smashed the book shut, more tears falling. She hasn't read that book in years but now realized something. She has never done any of these things. Well yes she visited Karasuno, Seijoh and Nekoma just about a month ago, but she still can't skateboard, nor did she ever went to the beach. 

"I'm dying and there is still so much I haven't done." [Y/n] cried and cried more. Everything hit her like a truck. Yes she just made fun of her death a few hours ago, but she is going to die. She won't be able to finish school or go to Europe, like she always wanted. 

Yes [Y/n] might seem like a crybaby, but that's what she did. Crying ,for hours on her bed thinking about what will happen next. 

Maybe she should just ask to live in the hospital again ? Or maybe she should just stay at her house till it's time ? Or jump off the room and see how many bones she can break ? 

"What the hell is going on with you." [Y/n] whipped the tears away and sat up. There was no way that she was going to let the last seven months of her life be miserable. 

[Y/n] thought about it, what Ms Sakusa told her. "Go live your life, do whatever you always wanted to do." So that is what she was going to do, but how would she know what she wanted to do exactly. 

That's when a thought hit her. A to-do list ? No that sounded stupid. Who makes a to-do list about things to do before they die ? 

"How about a Wishlist ?" [Y/n] looked at the teddy sitting in front of her. His head fell to the side and [Y/n] smiled. Either it was just plain coincidence or her mom agreeing with her. 

Either way, she quickly stood up with the teddy in her arms and began to write her little  
Wishlist


	3. two

49 things, not one more or less. That's how much [Y/n] wants to do before her time is up. It sounds kinda dramatic, if you ask her. "Till her time is up", sounds like a hourglass is ending. 

But [Y/n] thought that it sounded nicer then, till she finally sees Satan, or whatever is on that other side. Or maybe there isn't a other side ? Overall everything about what happens after death is just a myth, but [Y/n] was going to see if everything is just a lie or the truth. 

"49 things, that's a bit to much right ? Is that even possible, in 7 months ?" [Y/n] didn't know if she was even able to do everything in that time, what if her condition gets worse and she won't be able to walk ? 

"No the doctors said that it won't really effect my condition until the last month." [Y/n] was speaking to herself again, but she was only trying to get the bad thoughts out of her head, she didn't need them right now. 

[Y/n] took the green book and read through everything yet another time. Was she sure that she really wanted to do everything that stood there ? Yes she was sure, on this list stood everything she wanted to do. 

While she was reading or rather drawing things next to the list something hit her. All of these things, they sure are a lot and the major problem is, she can't do them on her own. 

Well some of them maybe, like going to her favorite restaurant and actually trying that one meal that looks so disgusting, [Y/n] doesn't even know the name. 

But some Things like, driving to Tokyo to visit her friends and going to the Skytree, how was she supposed to do this alone. Yes she could ask her dad, but she doesn't want to put any pressure on him. 

'Maybe I could ask Kuroo, Oikawa or Daichi ?' Well yes they have been her friends for a long time, but she hasn't even told them what is exactly happening and there is another problem. They will treat her like a baby, they always do, like she was a fragile little thing that was going to break any second. 

Which means she would need an older person, who doesn't know about her cancer and who won't baby her. [Y/n] thought about everyone she knew, but all of them were aware of her medical condition. 

That's when [Y/n] knew, it was probably a stupid idea, but school was going to start tomorrow and she knows no one there, which means no one knows about her cancer. 

She would just have to find someone, maybe a second or third year, who would help her with everything. But how was she going to find someone in a short amount of time ? 

'Let's think about that tomorrow, it's already late and it's my first day of school.' thought the girl and laid back down on her bed, her pajamas already on. 

As she was starring at the ceiling thinking about a way to find someone to help her, [Y/n]'s eyes got heavier and heavier, till she finally fell asleep. 

— The next morning 

Everything was quiet in the [L/n] household. [Y/n]'s father didn't come home that night, maybe he was sleeping at one of his friends ? 

As soon as the clock read 7:30 am [Y/n] was rudely interrupted from her sleep, by her alarm clock. 

"Oh my god shut up." [Y/n]'s hand reached forwards her nightstand, trying to shut off the annoying clock, but her hands couldn't reach it. A few weeks ago [Y/n] had the 'brilliant' idea to put the clock further away, so she would never oversleep. 

Thinking about it now, it was a stupid idea. "You little piece of shit. Just shut the fuck up." [Y/n] pushed her head off her pillow and quickly pulled the plug of the electric device. 

"Finally." [Y/n] fell back onto her pillow and looked at her phone. She still had about an hour till school starts and she has to be at the bus top in half an hour to get to school in time. 

"I hate this, why do i gotta do this. This is just a waste of my 7 months." [Y/n] mumbled to herself and went to the bathroom, doing her usual morning routine. 

When she was finally done, she went to her closet and put on her new school uniform. It was different from the one she had in middle school. Not only the color was different, but also the shoes had a much bigger heal then before. 

"i'm so gonna break my ankle in these." [Y/n] took her shoes and the schools jacket, yes apparently everything had to fit even their outdoor jackets. 

When she was finally done she took her backpack with her books and pencil case inside and went downstairs. She had exactly 10 more minutes till she had to leave the house. 

When she was downstairs she realized that her father wasn't home. Everything stood like she has left it yesterday. Yes it kinda worried her, but he is a grown man, he can do whatever he wants to. 

[Y/n] quickly opened the fridge and took her favorite drink and little snack for lunch out of it and put it inside her bag.

When she looked at her phone again she saw that it was time to go to the bus station. So she put on the jacket and her shoes and went outside. 

Even though it was only September, it was freezing cold outside. [Y/n] groaned and went to the bus station trying to think of something else rather then the cold. 

When she finally arrived she saw that there were already some kids standing there, but they were mostly middle schoolers. 

But [Y/n] noticed two boys standing at the side. They looked almost similar to each other, the only thing that was different was their hair color. [Y/n] saw that they were wearing the same school logo like hers, so she figured out that they were most definitely going to Inarizaki High. 

Before she could talk to them, the bus arrived and everyone went inside. It wasn't so full, like the bus she had to take in middle school, which was a nice change.

The bus drive didn't take that long, only about fifteen minutes. It was pretty silent in the bus, only some people whispered to each other. The loudest thing you could clearly hear was the two twins fighting, telling each other how stupid they are. 

When the bus finally arrived at school, [Y/n] quickly went outside and looked at the large school in front of her. There was no doubt that she was going to get lost here at least five times, but right now the easiest way to find the right entrance was following the other students. 

When she was outside of the big gates, she saw a boy sitting next to them, smoking a cigarette. Well he was trying to get out of the view of others but [Y/n] somehow still noticed him. 

His black hair was rather messy, matching his school uniform. The eyeliner he had was rather smeared, but still looked so beautiful on him. It was rather intoxicating looking at him and [Y/n] wasn't able to look away. 

She really didn't want to seem like a creep, but this boy looked so interesting to her that she tried to observe every little detail of his appearance. 

After a while the boy finished the cigarette and turned around looking [Y/n] in the eyes immediately. She was quite shocked, but they looked at each other for a split second. It was like he was able to look inside her soul. 

The boys brows raised and he rolled his eyes. He stood up and went to [Y/n] pushing her backwards slightly. "What are you starring at freak ? Seriously you stupid first years piss me off." 

"Suna. Leave her alone." [Y/n] turned around slightly and saw that there were a small group of boys and she could see the twins standing next to a rather taller guy, who had grey hair with black tips and was giving her a warm smile. 

"Oh please she started it, looking at me like a fucking stalker. Now get away from me, creep." The boy who's name was apparently Suna went to his friends but not without pushing [Y/n] yet another time. 

When she was sure that the boys were gone she turned around and went to her classroom. [Y/n] had a smile on her face and not only because she saw that there was still a free seat next to the window. 

[Y/n] found the perfect person to do her little Wishlist with. But how was she going to ask him to help her ? 

While these thoughts were running through her head a rather older woman came inside the classroom. But she wasn't alone, after her was another class which came inside. 

They looked older then the other first years and [Y/n] was a bit confused as to why they were there, but as she was looking at the people who just entered, she spotted a rather familiar face. 

Not only were there the boys from before but also the black haired boy, who still had the same annoyed look on his face. 

'What a coincidence.' thought the girl, well in her opinion it wasn't a coincidence. And while the other class tried to stand in one line, [Y/n] thought about a way to talk to the boy, before the older woman suddenly started speaking.


End file.
